How're you on this fine day?
Remember how we learned all about acid rain in elementary school – which for most of us was super upsetting! And then, very unfortunately, we were not taught what to do with our upset feelings?!
Do you remember that? (Or your version of it?)
We do! And, it wasn't that cool... (In fact, it's part of a long chain of similar events that led us all the way to creating the Center for Emotional Education!)
So today, we're sharing 3 ways that you can have an easier time with uncomfortable emotion.
#1: Feel Before You Act
The secret of emotionally successful people isn't that they never feel uncomfortable emotions – like anxiety, overwhelm, anger, shame, or jealousy – it's that they know how to feel before they act.
Emotionally unsuccessful people try to behave their way around these emotions. Either by compartmentalizing them and planning to deal with them later, or by trying to take some action in an attempt to get rid of the feelings. But it’s like trying to focus on other things while a pile of worms squirm on your head, or trying to organize your life in such a way that you never have to encounter worms (never mind that a pile of worms are already squirming on your head!).
It just doesn't work!
In Emotional Sovereignty School, our students go through the process of learning what their common emotions are and how to process them before acting and instead of getting derailed in the labor-intensive, ineffectual work of trying to get away from, or around, emotion.
We learn how to feel and deal with emotion instead of the worst-case scenario of wasting hours, or days, or years of our lives trying to eliminate uncomfortable emotion and only getting further entrenched.
There’s room for you in this class! :)
#2: Set SMART goals
Another way to set yourself up for greater emotional success?
SMART goals, originally created for business management teams, in 1981 by George T Doran.
Instead of setting vague goals, like, “I want to overcome anxiety” or “I want to feel better,” create SMART goals, ones that are:
Specific – referring to a discreet and minimal process involving observable action
Measurable – you (and any other involved parties) will know when it is done
Attainable – you (and your team) can make it happen
Resonant – it matters to you to do it
Time-oriented – it is attached to a timeline and the sooner the better
A SMART version of “I want to overcome anxiety” would be “For the next month, I’m going to spend five minutes five times per day doing the Survival Support strategies I have learned.”
A SMART version of “I want to feel better” would be “I’ll use my feelings list three times per day, and do one workout from this YouTube workout list, every day for 2 months.”
In Emotional Sovereignty School we share bite-sized strategies that are both SMART and fold easily into your existing life.
#3: Find community
You know the power of togetherness, companionship, and shared experience is potent. When we do things like: seek counsel from a close friend, talk about cats with our neighbors, or team up with community members to raise money for a cause – we are enjoying social influence and communal connection.
Our decisions and actions are deeply swayed by those around us. Pursuing your dreams – including the dream of emotional wellbeing! – within a supportive group brings encouragement, enthusiasm, and camaraderie that inspire us to strive even more than we might alone.
Plus, becoming part of a group gives just the right amount of incentive to keep showing up for ourselves and our loved ones. And if it's difficult to dive into unknown realms (like the world of emotion) on our own, community can offer exactly the inspiration and the fortitude we need.
Emotional Sovereignty School gathers like-minded folks from around the world to form a beautiful, authentic, and kind community. Plus, we make sure to gently facilitate low stakes personal connection as well!
We've heard that folks make more progress with their emotional wellbeing in just a few weeks of Emotional Sovereignty School than most people make in years of struggling on their own.
If you want to find emotional success by joining us, we'd love that!
Just click that beautiful button below to save your spot.
And if not, we love that you have that clarity! And, we do suggest that even if it's not with us, that you find a different way to feel before you act, set SMART emotional goals, and find community to walk with you along the way, because you deserve it! We all do.
We're cheering you on as always!
With love,
Natalie and Nathan